Last night I was in worship and God began to deal with me concerning encouraging myself more in him. I have felt completely helpless in past situations. In situations that were internal and I felt no one would understand no matter what words I used to explain my battle. I began to learn only God is made to understand and gives a few the ability to understand to a certain extent. I know only God can bring me out of whatever battles I face. Trying to explain to those God didn’t intend to know my battle creates more stress and frustration upon myself. After many words shared I would still feel helpless, no one could relate. As i grew in the natural and spiritual I found myself only counting on God to rescue, understand, and save me. Last night I wept during my personal worship time with God. In the midst of my tears God encouraged me and I felt reassured. God revealed to me the emotions I have been feeling the past few days are a result of the shift taking place inside me. He reminded me a shift brings forth uncomfortableness and trials but my obedience will bring forth the blessings. I'm aware I've drifted away from a level of spirituality I once had access to. I keep encouraging myself to fight, fight, fight to obtain that power again, so that I may encounter my destiny. It takes a lot of denying my flesh. I prayed last night for discernment and the release of anything holding me back from the pull of God. I desire to hear “well done my child”. Wanting to hear those words from God is encouragement enough. The last few days have been different and difficult for me. I can’t necessarily explain it, but I know God is doing something inside me. All I know to do at this point is encourage myself, pray, and stay consistent so I won’t miss the shift. I can’t afford to miss anything God is trying to do inside me or around me. I need him more and more every day. I need to deny myself more and more every day. I need him to pull on me more and more every day. I need him to test me more and more every day. I need him to save my family more and more every day. I need him to make me his example more and more every day. I need to live for him more and more every day. I want to know God more and more. Amen.